


Fathers of Camelot

by dellanec



Series: Kings of Camelot [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angry Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Attempt at Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Dialogue Heavy, Fluff and Crack, King Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), King Merlin (Merlin), M/M, Married Couple, new manservant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:07:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27524329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dellanec/pseuds/dellanec
Summary: King Arthur is told that his husband's sick, concerned for the sorcerer's health he goes to check on the man...Only to find that Merlin is covering for their incompetent manservant...again.Or Merlin's the cool parent and Arthur hates everyone.Idk what this is, like at all. But do read!
Relationships: Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: Kings of Camelot [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2011696
Comments: 15
Kudos: 278





	Fathers of Camelot

**Author's Note:**

> I just totally see Merlin adopting their manservant after becoming King because he understands having to deal with Arthur and then the two of them just complain and blow things up together LMFAO 
> 
> Also, all characters (except Lucius duh) belong to BBC.

“-and you _can not_ tell Arthur.”

Arthur stares in distaste, watching as his husband addresses their servant. The younger king paces their room, arms flailing as he lets out a string of colorful curses. 

_By the looks of it...Merlin was definitely not sick._

The blonde had practically begged Morgana to give their guests a tour in order to check on the sorcerer --who a passing servant had claimed was sick and in urgent need of rest.

Merlin hadn't been ill in ages and Arthur found he could hardly concentrate on their visitors, worry filling him at the thought of his husband shivering beneath bundles of blankets. But the scene before him tells another tale, it's quite obvious that Merlin is _perfectly fine_ and their chamber is in absolute ruins...again.

_Here we go._

“He can’t tell me what exactly?” Arthur has to bite back a triumphant grin as he watches the pair comically freeze, a horrid attempt at subtly. 

“Sire, can’t you make us invisible?” The servant whispers hastily towards his mentor. 

“I think he’s already seen us. The mage returns quietly. 

“No shit." Arthur sighs, running a hand down his face. "Now I’d love to hear what’s happened. So start talking. **Now.** ”

“Well, darling-” Merlin begins, dusting off his cape with a smile far too innocent to be real, “I’m feeling much better so I was helping him...clean-yes! We were cleaning!”

Arthur counts to three in his head before he responds. The tactic to remain calm one of Gauis' newest wonders. The physician had informed him of such methods and slipped him a tincture or two after Lucius and Merlin's last rendezvous... a horror he truly refused to recount.

“Is that so? So Lucius wasn’t using magic? And you weren’t pretending to be sick to fix the mess he’s made of our chamber?” 

“No," Merlin has the audacity to feign offense, shaking his head in defiance. 

_What a liar...a cute one. But a liar nevertheless and Arthur really did not have time._

“I swear to the gods if one of you doesn’t tell me-”

“Wait," Merlin interrupts, his burning gaze scorching into Arthur. "Aren’t **_you_** supposed to be welcoming our guests?” 

“Yes and so are you, idiot! They came here to discuss magic, so imagine their surprise when the _King of Magic_ isn’t there to greet them, only to have a servant come and claim you’re horribly sick. Are you absolutely stupid Merlin?”

“Oh please." The other sighs, waving his hand dismissively, "I’ll be at dinner! I don’t see why we both have to sit through introductions. They drag on and on about their stupid accomplishments that we both know aren’t true!”

“It doesn’t matter! We’re kings, we have to deal with it whether we like it or not. Now, before I drag you out of here tell me what is going on!”

Merlin's eyes darken, as they do when he's prepared for an argument, the type that can last for weeks or months if the sorcerer really felt like it. _Gods, Arthur hoped this was not one of those._

“I am **not** being dragged anywhere Arthur, I’m in the middle of an important cleaning session. Be a good little husband and entertain them until the feast.”

Their manservant stifles a laugh, instantly paling as Arthur turns to him with a pointed glare. “ _I know_ you’re lying Merlin.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

The blonde inspects the array of items littering the floor. Old armor, swords... _is that his favorite tunic?_

_Bloody-_

“Alright, Lucius, speak, now! What happened to my room?” 

“ **Our** room." Merlin snaps bitterly. 

“Shut up!" Arthur returns, annoyance bubbling, " Did we not build a whole chamber and training field for magic practice? Why on EARTH would you do this here?”

“Well-" The servant starts, his cheerful tone hardly compatible when the two kings' dark glares, "We needed items to use as target practice and Lord Emrys said your clothes were horri-”

“Lucius-” Merlin smiles dangerously, a warning in the glint within his eyes “-be quiet please.”

“Of course, sire.”

“Have you both lost your minds?" He turns an accusing finger at his husband, causing the other to bare his teeth. "Did we not agree you would wait until he was older to train him? The boy almost killed a noble last month!”

“I did?” Lucius asks wondrously and Arthur is almost certain there is nothing in that brain of his. _The boy was terrifying at times, honestly._

“He did not!" Merlin snarls, "That man was being dramatic and you know it!”

“His hair was burnt off Merlin!”

“Well, I can’t just stop teaching him Arthur, that’s not fair!”

“Yes, you can! In fact, Lucius, I demand you stop learning magic!”

The sorcerer steps in front of the redhead with a fiery scowl, “Don’t demand anything from him, you prat! He’s just a boy, are you trying to scare him?”

The redhead squeaks defiantly at the remark, raising his hand cautiously, “But...Lord Emrys, I’m fifteen already. I’m hardly a boy anymore.”

Merlin sighs, but nods nevertheless, “You’re right Lucius, you may no longer be a boy but that doesn’t mean clotpole here can be mean to you.”

“That’s quite true. Thank you, your highness.”

_Did his servants even respect him anymore?_

“HELLO?" He snaps, finally regaining their attention.

“Lucius doesn't want to speak to you." Merlin chides with a huff.

"Merlin don't you put your crude words into his mouth!" Arthur turns to their servant, forcing a wide smile onto his face. _Friendly thoughts_ , he reminds himself as he claps the boy's shoulder as he does the knights. "Lucius tell me what happened, I am your king and you are to be honest with me."

Lucius rubs at his shoulder, staring at him with something that appears to a combination of defiance and fear, “But...Lord Emrys is also my king and he said I can’t tell you.”

Arthur turns to his husband, ears red with rage. _Seriously, why did this man try and make his life harder?_

“Are you trying to turn our people against me?”

“Yes,” Merlin grins wickedly, his eyes narrowing teasingly “This is compensation for my years as your manservant. We’ve been planning your overthrow for quite a while, haven’t we Lucius?”

“We have?" The boy looks positively lost as he blinks, looking around as if he expects answers to appear amongst the air. "I thought you quite liked His Majesty.”

“Lucius my young lad, It’s called keeping your enemies close, a crucial life lesson.”

The servant nods earnestly with a frighteningly large smile, “You’re very wise sire, thank you.”

“My pleasure!”

_This can not actually be happening._

“He’s not being serious Lucius! Merlin, you can’t say things like that! What if he poisons me?!”

His husband rolls his eyes, shaking his head in annoyance, "I'd just unpoision you. That's what I did last time."

"EXCUSE ME?"

"It was an accident-" Lucius mutters stepping behind the mage, "I swear."

Arthur decides he doesn't want to know. “ENOUGH! There will be consequences if you refuse to speak!"

Both brunette and redhead blink unimpressed in return. 

"I’ll send you to the stocks! AND YOU-” The blonde sticks his finger into the other king’s face, retracting it before the man can bite it. “YOU’LL SLEEP ALONE TONIGHT!”

Lucius visibly deflates at the mention of his punishment, turning towards his mentor in defeat. “But...I still have bruises from last time.”

“I told you babies were not meant to fly-" Merlin shrugs nonchalantly, "and yet you still tried."

“But I caught them both! It’s not like they fell, they’re still perfectly fine and prancing around like normal babies, although neither of them can talk yet. I feel like they should have learned already. But that’s not my fault, I can’t go around teaching all the babies how to speak now, can I?”

“YOU DID WHAT?” Arthur is promptly ignored by them both. 

“Indeed-" The brunette nods solemnly, "-the babies will learn soon enough. But do you remember our new rule?” 

“Of course!" Lucius beams, unfounded pride bursting from his very being, "No more doing magic in the castle, in public, in the woods, at home, on the roof, or in other people’s homes if you’re not present!”

“Perfect, you’re a natural-" Merlin turns to him with a bright smile,"You see sweetheart, he’s even remembered our rules!”

Arthur's certain he’s been cursed. “Merlin-” He begins warningly, “-I swear I won’t come to bed for a month.”

The sorcerer rolls his eyes, turning away with a huff. “You’re fibbing Arthur.”

“I am not!”

“You can’t even last a week without pinning me to the-”

“THERE’S A CHILD IN THIS ROOM.”

“Oh... sorry Lucius. Please don’t tell your mother.”

“I’m not a child.” The servant mumbles belligerently.

“Listen here-” Arthur forces a bigger smile onto his face as he addresses the redhead. “-You were my manservant first and I’ve been King longer. So go on and tell me what happened. For old time’s sake, yes?”

The boy looks between the two rulers, face contorted by an obvious internal conflict. _Lucius also finds the older king's smile an absolute horrorfest._ “But...”

“How about he picks who he likes more and then he’ll do whatever they choose!” Merlin beams as if he’s found the solution to world peace. 

“Absolutely not! You’re his teacher of course he’ll choose you!”

“Not necessarily, you like us both, don’t you?”

The redhead gives an unconvincing shrug and Arthur’s sure he subtly shakes his head in disagreement, “I... guess.”

“You see! Now go ahead and tell us who you like better!”

“Uh...Your majesties, I don’t think I should answer this question. My mum says I could get in trouble.”

“No, go ahead-” The blonde grits through clenched teeth. 

“Arthur you’re threatening him with your face again!” 

“It’s my face for fuck’s sake! Do you want me to rip it off?”

“Watch your language!”

“Merlin, I am ignoring you from now on.”

“What?" The mage gasps scandalized, "Why?!”

“Because you’re an idiot!” 

“Then I’ll ignore you too! Because you’re a pompous prat!”

“You can’t do that, that’s just copying me!”

Merlin turns his back to the blonde, sticking his nose into the air defiantly. 

“Are you serious?!” 

“Lucius, please tell Arthur that I am ignoring him.”

“Sire, Lord Emrys wishes for me to inform you-”

 _“_ MERLIN PENDRAGON. I swear I’ll write to your mother and you _know_ she’ll take my side!”

“Oh-” Lucius gasps loudly, “Your highness- I think King Arthur’s quite angry. When my mum uses my full name she always ends up throwing something at me. Yesterday she threw a pot...she’s quite strong, actually. ” 

Merlin spares the teen a concerned glance before beginning his own threats. 

“You wouldn’t dare. Stop trying to turn my own mum against me every time we fight! I’ll turn your hunting dogs into toads again, just you wait!”

“Ha! I knew you couldn’t ignore me, you buffoon!” 

“You tricked me!”

 _“Your highnesses?”_ The teen was suddenly aware of his dire need for the chamber pot and if this quarrel was anything like the others...it would not end anytime soon.

“I didn’t trick you, you’re just an idiot!”

“I’d rather be an idiot than a stuck-up king.”

 _"You're_ a king as well! You can’t use that against me anymore!”

_“Um-pardon? My lords?”_

“But the children **actually** like me! **”**

“Well, they l **ove** me!” Arthur growls in return.

“Oh, now that’s just a lie! They run away from you.”

_“Excuse meeee... Kings of Camelot?”_

Lucius briefly wonders how the two haven’t killed each other yet. Maybe Emrys _was_ serious about the overthrow...

“They do no such thing!”

Merlin lets out a sarcastic laugh, “Daring, I watched a child hide from you when you walked past the other day.”

“Now _you're_ lying! I’ve never met a child that hasn’t liked me.”

“Then we must have a kingdom full of actors because they’re terrified of you!” 

“You are sleeping alone for two months now! I swear on-”

“Arthur don’t swear on that! I can’t sleep alone for 2 months! Are you mad?”

“Well, you should have thought about that before you turned our manservant against me, conspired a rebellion, and convinced all the children in the kingdom to hate me.”

“What are you talking about-” The younger king throws his arms up in exasperation.

“-Lucius still _kind of_ likes you, and you know I was only joking about the overthrow, I could _hardly_ train the knights myself. As for the children, that was all your doing. I swear I only tell them _mostly_ good things, it’s just that scary face of yours... _I_ still think you’re handsome though, so you should definitely not make me sleep alone. That would make you a cruel and unfair King, as well as a very **very** mean husband.”

“Well, I’m upset with you. So I don’t ca- NO, stop that! Merlin don’t give me that face! It won’t work this time.”

“Arthur-” The warlock steps forward, shooting his most enticing gaze. Bottom lip full and poking out into a pout. Bright eyes shining apologetically. 

The blonde slaps both hands over his eyes in a dramatic display as the redhead watches what he counts as the 32nd battle between the two since he’s begun his time as their manservant. 

_Lucius still really needed to pee though._

“You’re the devil himself!” 

“That’s so rude!” Merlin snaps in horror, turning away from his lover bitterly. 

“You know what you’re doing! You always make that face when I’m angry at you and then I can’t help it. You’re just so-so-”

“Cute?” The manservant offers helpfully. 

Arthur drops his hands to serve him a deadly glare, “He won’t let me kill you but I will not hesitate to throw you in the dungeons for the rest of your life. Do you understand?”

“Lucius, ignore him, he’s like a bear. Big, strange, and possessive.”

_“Okay...your majesties may I-”_

“You’ve done this on purpose Merlin! You started an argument so I’d forget about the mess!”

“I have not!” 

Brunette and Redhead gape in horror as Arthur reaches down to inspect his tunic. 

“Wait don’t-” 

“Is this-”

“Oh no.” 

“-IS THIS BURNT?” The blonde roars as he lifts the remains of his shirt.

“Well sire, if we’re being honest now-” He turns to Merlin searching for approval, “May I tell him?” 

“I need to lift the glamour, but give a quick prayer first, and then you may.” 

Arthur watches, mouth agape as Lucius closes his eyes and blurts what can hardly be considered an appropriate prayer. 

“King Arthur-" The boy starts confidently,"-I have burnt your clothes-”

“OBVIOUSLY.”

“And-”

“There’s an AND?”

The room suddenly becomes blinding as Merlin’s eyes flash gold. 

“-There’s a... hole in your ceiling.”

The blonde blinks several times, trying to process what he had heard. As it settles, he slowly lifts his head up, bracing for the worst. 

And It’s **far worse** than what he had braced for. The word “hole” is nowhere near being the right description for the disaster.

It was at least the size of an adult dragon and the remainder of it was burnt and ready to fall at any moment. 

It did at least explain the abrupt brightness.

Arthur stares up for several moments, his face burning bright as he hears the sorcerer warn through ringing ears. 

“Lucius-” 

The older king returns his gaze to the servant silently. 

“So it's not too bad, right, sire? 

“NOT TOO BAD? YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY DEAD.” He explodes angrily. 

Merlin sighs before waving the boy away, “I’d run if I were you.”

With a quick bow, the redhead turns and sprints away.

Arthur doesn’t bother following, cursing as he turns to his husband, ready to pounce. “You-”

“Are the most beautiful man on the planet?”

“-ARE JUST AS BAD AS HE IS.” 

The blonde lunges forward and is met with...nothing.

_Fuck magic._

His husband had disappeared into thin air. 

...

“MERLIN!” The shout rings throughout the entire castle and the children playing outside do indeed hide at what they mistake as a battle cry.

A reply is yelled from the hall by the fleeing sorcerer.

“I’LL GET YOU A NEW TUNIC!”

Arthur bursts from the chambers, storming after the horrified squeal. 

“GET YOUR ARSE BACK HERE!”

“I HAVE TO GO GREET THE VISITORS.”

“OH, SO NOW YOU AREN'T SICK?”

~~~

That night the mage is forced to sleep alone for a total of 10 minutes before Arthur wordlessly appears in his old chambers and drags him back to bed.

Lucius is sentenced to the stocks for a month, in which Merlin quickly sneaks down and helps him escape the all too familiar torture of vegetables. 

The servant of course is sent back a week later when he accidentally kidnaps a knight. 

**Author's Note:**

> Again, idk what this was. Hope you enjoyed tehe.


End file.
